Saturday 7 June 2008

HETFET Unmask Big Red!

This just in from HETFET News, seems all those calls to the HETFET hotline paid off!

HELLBOY - DEVIL MAN UNMASKED!

Calls have been pouring in to the HETFET HOTLINE, confirming the existence of the red-skinned mystery creature whose recent sightings have put the nation on high alert. Citing a major breakthrough in the so-called “Devil Man” investigation, credible sources claim to have discovered his true identity. His name is apparently Hellboy, although it has been impossible to get confirmation of this from the so called “research and defense agents” who have suddenly stepped in to control the situation.

While it is still not clear exactly what a Hellboy is, HETFET has confirmed that he (or it) has been seen in conjunction with a large number of troll sightings around the globe. Hellboy’s intention is still unknown but those that have witnessed him in action report that he is often followed by a trail of destruction. The Hellboy sightings have increased over the last month and seem to be on the rise.

We would like to thank those brave enough to call the HETFET Hotline - your eye witness accounts have made it possible for us to better understand creature migration patterns as well as this strange Hellboy phenomenon. Although the Hellboy is still at large and somewhat volatile, we have enough evidence to know that he doesn’t seem to pose a threat unless antagonized.

As far as HETFET is concerned, Hellboy is one more creature that deserves ethical treatment and fair consideration from humanity.

1 comment:

Alison Robin said...

The part about the trail of destruction was best. It does seem that everywhere he goes things get broken left and right.